Class of 1917

An anonymous contributor sent a marked copy of The Marblehead Messenger to this office. It is surprising to learn of the farreaching effect of Mr. Hearst s intensive search for news. He doesn't seem to miss a trick, and he certainly does "know all and see all. It might be said that he. over-steps our idea of news inasmuch as he chose to report the fact that Brother Spearin functioned effectively as the director of a big Christmas party for the kiddies in Marblehead. Hot stuff, Bill, and we hope that more of our brethren will discover the way to righteousness that they may better walk the sawdust trail. Word comes from "Bart" Shackford that he is leaving Decatur, Illinois, to set up shop in Los Angeles. Our hustling little cathologist will undoubtedly find an ample field for activity in that hectic locality on the other side of our country. Don't forget to keep us posted on all Hollywood brethren and include in your reports any word of visiting Seventeeners.

Anybody that has the nerve to say that our class had a low degree of mentality will promptly be referred to the Cross Word Puzzle Department of the Boston Evening Transcript. They will be instructed to ask for a copy of the puzzle entitled "Northern Light" which was created by A. Hey wood Knowlton of Hanover, N. H. Professor Knowlton, erstwhile known as "Prof." sent a shudder through the spine of those sharks who claim that no puzzle can baffle them. It was a corker! And if Dick Morenus and George Gregory are still as clever in solving these labyrinths as they used to be, we will be glad to break their long standing record by calling their bluff on the Professor's puzzle. Oh for a clutch at the throat of the dastard oulaw who invented this thief of time. In spite of all that, more power to you, Professor Knowlton.

If any one can conceive of a justifiable reason why we should see George Currier's income tax return, we wish they would forward that reason to this office. It is imagined that that return would reveal interesting news. Hence our desire for a reason to see it. No, George isn't bootlegging but he claims to have offered his hard earned hockey education, on a gratis basis, to the Boston Hockey Club. He has been accused of professionalism but replies that he is still a. "Simon-pure."

This is just the way we got it, so it is handed on to you without change. "Mr. and Mrs. Frederick A. Havens of Germantown announce the engagement of their daughter, Evelyn, to Mr. Ralph R. Britton of South Hadley Falls, Mass." Comment would be superfluous. But we cannot resist the temptation to recall the nomination of Brother Black and that picture of little Ralph as an ambitious freshman. Lord deliver us but times do change!

Hal Clarke crashed through with a nice long letter shortly "after we had sent in our news for the last copy of the MAGAZINE. Quoting that letter in part, "On September 22, Gladyce L. Worlein of Minneapolis became Mrs. H. V. Clarke. On September 24, we were burned out of the Spaulding Hotel at Duluth, Minn., at 3 a. m. September 26, failing to heed two rough looking individuals who tried to stop us on a lonely road, we were nearly blown off the map. Luckily we were beyond the explosion and going fast enough to get out from under. Haven't found out yet whether they were hold-up artists or part of a highway repair crew blasting a ledge. September 29, I was pinched for speeding and fined $15." We would offer the suggestion to Hal that he find a lonely spot in the woods next September and there hibernate till the month has come and gone unless he expose himself to further ravages of fate, during that unlucky month. In regard to the last item, we are very sorry indeed that he neglected to notify us of his arrest because we feel sure that even way out there in Michigan, George Currier could have fixed things up for him.

Down in Tyngsboro, Mass., which is a residential suburb of the hustling city of Lowell, Mass., Gardner Lyman Sherburne appeared on December 13 to bring joy to the hearts of Max and his wife. Our vocabulary is fast becoming exhausted in our endeavor to express adequate satisfaction over each new addition to our lengthening list. However, the least we can do is to forward this name to Dean Bill and ask him to make proper preparations to receive Master Gardner about 1942.

The situation with which your Secretary is confronted is serious. Disappointment, dejection, despair, and the utter futility of living cast a shadow over him of such magnitude and density that he is almost prompted to tender his resignation. Day after day seems to bring new chronicles of continued success by all others except himself in the contest of hearts. In order to minimize the anguish, it is absolutely necessary to do no more than just mention the fact that Walt Carr has surprised us all by announcing his engagement to his friend, Miss, Kidder, in Woodstock, and that Johnnie Byers has announced his engagement to Miss Emma Anna Wiedwald. We are almost prompted to refuse the publication of further announcements of a similar nature and we promise that this anticipation will be immediately effective if Barney Thielscher has. the nerve to leave our small select gathering.

The other morning, the Secretary ran into Red Shattuck out in Cambridge. Red is attending Harvard at the expense of the United: States Navy. Without mentioning anything personal, we do hope that those members of the Class who have influence with their Congressmen will request an investigation into the useless outlay of our government funds. If we didn't know that Red was bright or that Bob Shaffer was bright, this might apply to them but before the appropriation is entirely exhausted, we would like to have other minds, improved. However, make a note of it as a subject for discussion at the next class meeting.

Speaking a little more seriously, we want to register our hearty thanks to those few men who were kind enough to send us new word of their activities. This prompts the suggestion that every one of you find out something about the other fellow and send it to us Everybody seems to wait for someone else to do the work and that seems to be the necessary procedure. So, if you see anything in the newspapers, wherever you may be, that applies to a member of our class, clip it out and send it by air, mail, wireless, telephone, telegraph, or ordinary two-cent postage, to your Class Secretary.

Many thanks.

Secretary, 37 Arlington St., Cambridge, Mass.