1980

May I have your attention please? May I have your attention please? Will the real class of'80 please stand up? I repeat, will the real class of '80 please stand up? We're gonna have a problem here. Y'all act like you never sent an e-mail before No phone, no fax, no letters, no nothing no more And I can't buy these columns at the quick mart store In June I went to Seattle for a wedding there Dan Drais '83, not our class, so what do you care? Lots of Dartmouth people from all over flew in Bright eyed, earnest, friendly, thinking they can still win Too busy and too cool to take a Dartmouth photo I was the old one there and toasted in a voice not sotto Cause we're older and they're not us They're not yet like us No names here, because I can't remember them. Anonymous. I'm class of'80, yes I'm class of'80 Are all you other class of'80s imitating? So won't the real class of'80 please stand up, Please stand up, please stand up? Merle Adelman is a real '80, an energy machine First her coat, then her blood, now her skin and teeth are all green Merle hung with Laurel Smith last Homecoming and watched the fire Living in Boise, Laurel says she's retired To spend time with daughter Emma and husband Kevin Donahue Greg Henry was in town again from Houston, looking for Tony Garippo On the Green too were Steve and Todd Hermann-James, with Greg, their son While later in San Francisco, Merle had lunch with psychologist Greg Clinton They shared memories of being in Hitchcock dorm together,young shmen And they say they still are, but Merle, Greg, you're just kidding yourselves Merle talked to Chris Lucas, an information technology manager in Beverly Hills He's worked up and down California, was in a soap, bet he knows some swells. Merle's class of'80,yes she's class of'80 Are all you other class of'80s imitating? So won't the real class of'80 please stand up, Please stand up, please stand up? Merle ran into Robin Shrier Inman and husband Bill at an AMC bike rally Living near Boston; Robin and Bill like to ski at places like Waterville Valley First weekend in April, Joe Misiewicz went with his son Eric, age 11 To ski on new snow, 4 inches, in Tuckerman's Ravine; said it was heaven They went over the headwall twice and expect to keep ski'ng 'til June. For me, I'll stay down South where the flowers bloom South in Birmingham is Dr. Marc Feldman Hey, Feldman, Whadda Ya Know? Not much. You? But Marc knows a lot about fakers and pretenders, so If you cry wolf too many times, will anyone believe you're not Munchausen? And wasn't it Peggy Lee who sang, "Come onna over to my house? But a former faker from England (was it Birmingham?) contacted Marc And convinced him her problem was real, and sadly it was The New York Times thought it was news that was fit to print And there on the page is Marc smiling at his patient Moral: Be real, don't fake it. So, who's the real '80? Now who's the real '80? So won't the real class of'80 please stand up, Please stand up, please stand up?

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