Concerning Popcorn

The chance for a bit of spoofing doesn't occur often enough in academic cloisters and ought not to be missed when it does come along. We were pleased to find Dartmouth putting this philosophy into practice recently—on the subject of Indians, Pilgrims and popcorn. It all started in The Christian Science Monitor when John Gould wrote an article on popcorn, resulting in some speculation as to how the Indians could have popped their popcorn before the Pilgrims arrived with the devilish inventions of civilized man.

When a Dartmouth man considers Indians he thinks, naturally, of Dartmouth, so from Charles W. Morrill 'l2 of Winchester, Mass., there arrived in the President's Office a letter addressed to "Eleazar Wheelock's Indian School" as follows: DEAR SIR: Will you kindly tell me how the Indians popped corn before the Pilgrims landed in 1620? When the corn popped, how did the Indians keep it from scattering? Thank you.

It took a little while for Dartmouth's authorities to get squared away on that one, but the aforementioned philosophy gained the upper hand and the following tongue-in-cheek reply departed in the 5:15 Hanover mail: DEAR MR. MORRILL: It is very fortunate that Eleazar Wheelock left such complete records; so that it is possible to tell you just how the Indians popped corn before the Pilgrims landed.

They used the shell of the speckled tortoise (Clemmys guttata) for a receptacle. This was deep enough to keep the popping corn from scattering to the side; any corn that popped completely out was caught with a butterfly net. Yours truly, George Spelvin, Research Assistant.

A few days later the übiquitous George Spelvin got his name in The ChristianScience Monitor when Don Messenger reprinted the exchange of correspondence in his column, "Off the Beaten Path." The cartoon by Phil Bissell illustrating the column is reproduced on this page through the courtesy of The Monitor.