And So They Were Married
(In 1784)
Last winter I had occasion to look into the files of thePennsylvania Gazette (the first American Newspaper toprint a daily edition) in connection with some researchwork. In the course of my rambles my attention was suddenly arrested by the enclosed item which is of considerableinterest.
I have spent some time trying to identify the personagesmentioned in the account. For a time, I believed that J W —might be John Wheeloclc, but correspondencewith Mr. Harold Rugg convinces me that I was in errorthere. It has, however, occurred to me that this accountmight be of interest to the ALUMNI MAGAZINE inasmuchas it presents a picture of a period at Hanover which weknow comparatively little about. It is furthermore to benoted that this report is interesting as a sample of the wayin which early newspapers gained material for. theircolumns. The dearth of sufficient news of the human interest variety in a town led to the borrowing of such choicemorsels as this from other papers. It will be noticed thatthe tale made its way from Hanover to Keene, thence acrossthe only bridge of the period to Windsor, then to Newburyport, and finally to Philadelphia (an excellent example ofthe way news traveled in those days and of how it probablywas much garbled in transit). One would be led to observethat the reporter was in the van of the multitude which made"Bacchus shudderl have convinced myself, after someinvestigation, that this really came from Hanover, and Ioffer it to the MAGAZINE for what it is worth as of interestto Dartmouth men. No doubt many of the members of theCollege faculty, and, perhaps, the more fortunate ones of thestudent body, were present at this memorable ceremony,which drew forth a most startling and incredible piece oftruly Eighteenth Century euphuistic prose writing. Oneis tempted to speculate what the writer's verse would havebeen like.
If you care to use this I shall be only too glad to offer itto you. I am sorry that I have been unable to determine thenames of those who are mentioned in the account.
Newburyport, (Maffachufetts) Sept. 3,
The following curious account is taken from the Vermont Journal, publifhed in Windfor, in that State, Auguft 4, 1874. Keen, July 28, 1784.
SHE WAS A VISION OF DELIGHT
We hear from Hanover, that on Sunday evening the 18th inftant, were celebrated the nuptial rights between the moft honorable, the moft renowned, the moft auguft and immortal, J W————, and the moft amiable, virtuous, accomplifhed, ferene, and beatific Mifs L T ; fhe is allowed to be a perfect portrait of the moft brilliant beauty, agility, and activity, and the natal abridgement of every mental and corporal perfection ever found among that fair and polite half of the human race. Likewife, that the conjugal, or matrimonial chain, the fame evening, encircled within its precincts, the great Mr. I) P—-— fquire, lord mayor of O , duke of F , and earl of P and Mifs C Tooo, who though her externals are fomewhat dark and gloomy, by reafon of much concoction and friction; yet her intellectual fyftem fhines with far more benign and diffuffive beams than the blufhing morn, or Sol in his meridian fplendor. We would likewife inform the public, that the entertainment on this occafion, was every way adapted, and in no refpect difhonorary to the above mentioned perfonages. This was atchieved by the magnanimous and indefatigable Dr. T , (fire of the two young ladies) who by his diffuffive benevolence, and magnanimity of foul, provided a whole hetacomb to fatiate the avidity of the venerable attendance. And never did Bacchus fhudder with fuch prodigious tremours, for fear his fund would be exhaufted, as by beholding with what precipitant and unabiting cataracts the fparkling wine gufhed from his ponderous jars.
[Ed. Note: Forhetacomb read barbecue and for ponderous jars, hogsheads.]
THE TRANSMOGRIFIED DOGS
Likewife thefe connubial perfonages dignified with the panegyric eclat and commendation of various and almoft innumerable cohorts of the moft embellifhed virtuofos and profound fages. Thofe celebrated nuptials caufed such ejaculating agitations in the atmofphere, that even dormant bells roufed their pufilanimous, and lethargic tongues, to fpeak forth in the. moft fublime ftrains their incomparable hilarity and glee; in laudability of this moft noble quaternion. Thefe amphibiouf, conchilous animals, were ftript of their horny fhirts, which were employed as vehicles to fhout immortal honors to this consummately happy and dignified fraternity. Moreover, there were such tremendous ululations, by launched, deputified, and tranfmogrified dogs, that even Mars awoke from his iron den, and deprecated Jupiter to defend with his flaming thunderbolts, and join with him in raifing compact homogenial vollies, in augmentation to the uncommon, never to be forgotten, ever to be remembered aufpicious and halcyon celebration.
Printed in the Pennsylvania Packet, Saturday, September 25, 1784, Page 2, column 4. Transcribed exactly as printed. Copy may be seen in the Library of the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, Phila delphia.
