The Bottom Line

Imagine two presidents alone in a corporate conference room trying to strike a deal. One sports a gold watch cum calculator, the other smokes a pipe. The calculator wearer runs a large, growing computer company with 5,000 employees and plenty of cash. The pipe smoker runs a large, urban university with 15,000 students and plenty of bills. The industry president needs more scientists; the university president needs more teaching staff. It comes time, to discuss the bottom line:

"How much do you need to support an additional engineering graduate?" asks the corporate president, his calculator at the ready.

The pipe lights up. "Well, doctorates are twenty times more than masters, and masters five times more than bachelors. Which do you want?"

"Let's try masters."

"With thesis or without? Our faculty insists on the thesis for quality reasons, but it takes 25 per cent more time and money."

"All right, but how much?" The calculator gets impatient.

The pipe smoke thickens. "Well, if it's a computer science grad, he'll need a computer as part of his studies. Then there's lab equipment, not to mention renovation of the floor space required. At the moment, we've been unable to fill several vacancies on our computer science faculty, so I 11 throw in the cost of a new professor. Besides computing, do you want your graduate to read and write?"

"Read and write.

"Yes, we'll have to prorate part of the remedial training and some of the English lit department into the cost. What about sleeping? The dormitories are presently at capacity, so there'll be some construction costs to be factored in."

"Hey, I didn't ask to endow a dormitory! All I want is a good man who knows computers."

"A man?" puffs the pipe. "We ran out of them a long time ago. But for 20 per cent more, we can boost our high school program to get more women into engineering."