The Undergraduate Chair

A piercing whistle on a Saturday afternoon brings a hundred howling musicians galloping to the five-yard line of Memorial Field ...

"And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, for your listening and viewing pleasure we advise you to leave the field because here conies the Dartmouth College Marching Band ..."

A satirically humorous introduction but also quite ironic for the Dartmouth Band strives to present an amusing, entertaining halftime show. More appropriate would be leaving the field at the arrival of other Ivy League bands which have sought to "attain higher levels of vulgarity"—to quote a Yale alumnus from the football insert of last month's magazine.

In the last decade, Ivy League bands have moved further and further from traditional high-stepping formations that provided only a boring time out for a break to the Coke stand. As more spectators remained to watch the humorous shows, the bands increased their vulgarity and undisguised raunch until crowds were watching 50-yard phallic symbols and costumed mascots copulating on the field. Aside from the loss of snack-bar revenue, many administrators and alumni have objected to the spectacles on moral grounds, although at last report the erotic entertainment continues unabated in Providence, New Haven, and Princeton.

Second-year president and four-year veteran of the Dartmouth Band, (David) Randy Smith '73, says, "The purpose of our halftime shows is entertainment and humor-—for the crowd and for ourselves ... but we aim for humor in good taste, which is not seen as entertainment at other schools."

That is not to say that the Dartmouth community does not enjoy an earthy joke or that the Band has never hit below the belt. But halftime shows at Memorial Field are presented, as Smith says, in good taste, though the hard work often goes unrecognized, such as the quiet preparation for the Princeton game ...

Fifteen band members gathered at the Sunday night brainstorming session to arrange the halftime show for the following weekend. Each year the Band does shows for all home games and three away games, including both pre-game and halftime. In view of the nebulous status of the College symbol and/or mascot, they decided to bring the question into the open and run their own contest for the Princeton game.

"... here comes the Dartmouth College Marching Band presenting today's halftime show entitled: 'Search for a Mascot or Clash of the Symbols.' " (Cymbal Clash)

Ideas came quickly. First, they would make an obvious suggestion by forming a Budweiser can on the field ...

"As you may have seen on T-shirts around campus: 'Dartmouth Made Milwaukee Famous.' For this reason the beer can has been raised many times in discussion of the mascot."

(Play: "When You Say Bud") Followed by an amorphous Big Green formation on the field. (How do you form a Big Green, anyway?) accompanied by: "Green, green, it's green they say."

Inevitably the Band would have to recognize that Fabulous Beast (as quoted from Alice in Wonderland by Vice President Ruth Adams at Convocation), The Dartmouth Animal.

"... The Band is unable to form a complete animal on the field and will form instead its most significant part ... its paw."

(Play: "Talk to the Animals.")

Hurrying to cram everything into the seven allotted minutes, the Band would then form an "applause meter," with a large painted arrow, to measure the crowd reaction to each of the symbols listed by announcer George Wollojian '73. Big Green registers 20 per cent; Animal Paw, 30 per cent; Princeton Tiger, negative percentile; Thunder-chickens, 50 per cent; Bud Can, arrow goes off the meter and the Band leaves the field under showers of laughter.

Smith says, "There's a nice undertone to that show because it draws laughter to a subject that has become an uncomfortable topic on campus. On one hand the show is humorous, but it still demonstrates that we don't really have a mascot. And if it is the Big Green; well, Big Green what?"

After finalizing details, the halftime script goes to the Dartmouth Athletic Council for censoring.

"The shows are held at our events in our facilities so we demand the right to check their contents," says Athletic Director Seaver Peters. "We have a good working relationship with the Band, and I think our shows have been in good taste."

After receiving DCAC approval, the Band practices music on Tuesday afternoons, outlines formations on Thursdays, matches music and formations on Friday, and rehearses the entire program Saturday morning. Meanwhile, the officers work on technical difficulties like building the world's largest tuba, trying to buy 100 kazoos in the Hanover area, or constructing a 20-foot phosphorescent arrow for an applause-meter. Then too, there is special music to be arranged and a pre-game show to work out. But in the end comes the appreciative response of the spectators who now look forward to the familiar stampede of the Dartmouth College Marching Band.

"We don't want applause ... we're looking for laughter," says Smith. "Since I've been in the Band, the crowd reaction has grown steadily and that's because we're geared to audience participation."

Owing to several notable successes, especially the First Annual Salute to Mediocrity in 1970 and the Second Annual Salute to Mediocrity in 1971, the membership has nearly doubled over the past four years. With this increased "interest, a jocular esprit decorps has arisen in the Band, which recruits new musicians from posters reading:

If you can walk and if you can play an instrument, or either of the above...

Then the Marching Band wants you.

Donald Drakeman '75, publicity chairman for the Band, says, "We make people laugh and that's important. After all, there are only two organizations on campus devoted to humor—us and The Dartmouth."