1984

Well, as I'm sure most of you are aware, I did not, I repeat, did not, win the coveted "Secretary of the Year" award. Unbelievable, right? I mean, who better than me? The loss was a great personal blow to me. I think that I can now understand how Mike Dukakis felt when he lost the race for governor. Like Dukakis, I was forced into a period of soul searching. What am I doing wrong? Perhaps I should change my style, include more names, tell the truth once in a great while. The only problem was that I didn't know whether you, the reader, wanted the truth, or were happy with my monthly fusillage of wild rumors. Well, I finally came up with a solution. I will now let you, the public decide which is better: truth or slander. Simply send your preference to me, and I promise to abide by the results, as long as I agree with your conclusions. Well, here goes.

Truth: Karen Francis is planning our 5th Reunion, which will take place June 1618, 1989. All are encouraged to attend. Those of you interested in helping Karen can get in touch with her at One Soldiers Field Park #322, Harvard Business School, Boston, MA 02163.

Slander: Karen Francis reports that she has recently been jailed, for shoplifting, at the federal pen in Attica, N.Y. Karen says that any classmate who finds him/herself in a penal institution should look her up. Karen's parole is set for June 16, 1989.

Truth: Beth O'Neill has graduated from Georgetown Law School and been admitted to the Massachusetts Bar Association. Beth is currently employed by Peabody and Brown in Boston.

Slander: Those of you who find yourselves incarcerated in the great state of Massachusetts may want to risk calling on barrister Beth O'Neill. Beth claims to have graduated from Georgetown, but I gotta level with you. I've lived in Washington for a few years, and I never once saw her here.

Truth: Peter Wolcott, who is a student at the University of Arizona, recently visited the Soviet Union. Peter was the guest of the Institute of Cybernetics of the Estonian Academy of Science in Tallin, some 600 miles northwest of Moscow on the Gulf of Finland.

Slander: Could I make up something better than the "Institute of Cybernetics of the Estonian Academy of Science in Tallin?" I know when a story is too good to tamper with.

Truth: David Frulla, who graduated from the University of Virginia School of Law, was admitted to the Maryland Bar in January. The story was picked up by Dave's hometown newspaper, in Glens Falls, N.Y.

Slander: "Local man is admitted to bar" read the oversized headline in the Glens Falls Post Star, and the story behind the headline is even more bizarre. After a period of 127 years, during which no citizen of Glens Falls ever managed to gain access to a saloon, Dave Frulla managed to sneak into Zsa-Zsa's Royal Exotic Palace and take two sips of a watered down drink before he was shown the door. A statue is to be erected in the town square in Dave's honor.

Well, there you have it. It's now up to you, the readers, to decide the future of my column. Your comments will be held in the strictest confidence, unless you have something negative to say. Operators are standing by to accept your calls.

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