1939*
Dear Peter Cardozo,
When I married you, just one year ago today, it was for "better or worse," but the minister didn't say anything about you being able to go off on a "tear" for a month, leaving me to write your darn old class notes for the ALUMNI MAGAZINE. Yeah, I know. You said it would be easy this month. November 20th was to be '39 night all over the country. There would be dinners, speeches and lots of beer. The boys would all write to me and let me know who was there, what they said, and how much they had to drink. It was going to be easy. I could bake a cake with one hand and write the column with the other. Yeah!
You said the mail was going to be so heavy that I would probably get housemaid's fingers from opening the envelopes. Yeah! I got three post cards....and all of them from YOU. One from "Leon & Eddies" (I know! Just a couple of the boys!) "The Falstaff Room-Hotel Biltmore-Providence" (Don't tell me—you were studying Shakespeare!) "The Stork Club" (Your cousin was having a baby!)
Look, darling, I taught your freshman class, I ran your Writing Clinic, but when it comes to alumni notes—that's grounds for divorce. Last week Sid Hayward called to remind you that the tenth was the deadline. I told him your COLD was better and you would be well enough to do the column. ("In sickness and in health" —my mother should have told me about you men!) Well, after Sid called I sent out some wires to the boys who were supposed to run the class dinners. Joe Mason apologized from Detroit.
Joe said: "Plans were laid for a dinner, and an eating emporium located and reserved. Bob McLeod Was to give us spicy football stories and a swell informal gettogether was in order. All the men were notified. .. .and the gist of the matter is that the dinner didn't come off. I don't know how it was in New Hampshire this year, but it turned out that the dinner was to be held the night before Thanksgiving and Bill Bachman and myself were the only ones that could be on hand."
Jim Garnett reported from Chicago: "We were forced to postpone our dinner, because we got insufficient response to pay the restaurant for opening a special room. Either the time was wrong or we didn't give enough advance notice. The latter is very possible as I didn't have any indication that Jim Donovan, who was supposed to run the affair, would be called to the coast for active duty with the marines."
Junie Merriam didn't answer from New York. He's probably lost on the crosstown shuttle!
Pem Pleasants was too busy bouncing Pem Jr. on his knee to write from Boston, but Martin Howell crashed through with the following: "Twenty of us showed up at the Gunlach Hofbrau. Nothing formal, just a quiet group in the corner talking about jobs, babies, babes and '39ers in Nat'l Defense. Pem and Len managed to get out Jim Feeley, Keith Anderson, Jim . Parks, Clem Burnap, Ed Daley, Endie Smith. And during a discussion about the "fifth down" Stan Brown stepped over and straightened us out. Dick Reubling was unable to dislodge Woodward, Balboni, Martinson, Newton or the rest of the Business school contingent due to academic pressure. Ed Cummings, Homer Skeels, Charlie Glovsky, George Adams also present quaffing brew. Dick Brooks and Mert Tarlow with the lowdown on the V-7 Naval Cruises. Both made the grade and on their way to additional training to be Ensigns. Also, news of Bud Foster, Wolf Taylor, and Bart Jones, all in air corps work."
Well, DARLING, that's the score on your '39 dinners. Three strikes—one dinner!
And then it was 4 A.M. The college turned off the heat at twelve and I sat there with a hot water bottle, a blanket, and a bottle of that lousy rye you serve your guests. I had the column half done; I was completely done. I thought to myself that it would have been better to have stayed an old maid, and then I remembered that some of your classmates were "I-doing-it." (That was your synonym for marriage last month—Gad, you're corny!)
I read a lot of old newspapers and found out that Pete Talbot became engaged to Gertude Flitner of Englewood, N. J. I saw where Billy Goodman got engaged. (The dog tore the paper and I couldn't read his fiance's name.) Sherm Brown finally got Katherine Murphy of N. Y. C. to say yes. Haskell Davenport was married to Doris Herre on Sept. 21 in Harrisburg, Pa. John Page was married on the last Thursday in November. The girl's name is unknown. Chuck Goodrich put a ring on Bettie Gilman's finger in Waterbury, Conn, on October 6. Sam Thurm "got hisself" engaged to Miss Ruth Elaine Blum. O'Brien Boldt and Elizabeth Roberts had their troth announced in Ridgewood, N. J. way back in September. Ditto for Ev Woodman and Ruth Randolph. Jerome Beatty (the guy you owe a letter) wed Joan C. Churchill on Nov. 15 in Pelham Manor, N. Y.
Ah! Marriage Ahl Alumni Notes. LISTEN GIRLS: Take it from one who knows. Don't let your husband get mixed up in this Alumni Column business. Make him sing the songs, make him go to the dinners, make him go to reunions, but when it comes to this "hunt and peck" (not for the typewriter keys, but for news!) system—don't let him do it.
Well, Peterkins.... it got to be 5 A.M. I listened to the Milkman's Matinee until the real milkman came. The sun started to come up over Balch Hill. (Balch Hill.... you and your promises that week-end of Green Key!)
FRANTICALLY
I thumbed through your Aegis. Bunch of nice looking fellows—too bad Dartmouth didn't put in a course of "letter writing" for them. Saw Ralph Champney's picture; understand he's living in Virginia now. Bob McLeod is playing pro basketball at night for the Detroit Automobile Club Team (regular job with Liberty magazine). Roy Demmon has been transferred to New York City by U. S. Gypsum. John Mecklin is now in Chicago for the United Air Lines.
I remembered that Tom Burrell and Fred Tower paid you a visit last fall. (Why doesn't Tommy send you some of that Coca (Pause that Refreshes) Cola? Saw Arny Childs in town. Understand he's working with that Tunbridge Work Service Camp Movement. Also saw Jack Durrance on his way to a class at the Med. School. Understand that Bud Fink was in Providence for the Brown game—newspaper business. Jim Fuller was in Hanover for the Cornell upset. Bill Martin is working for the Sociology Dep't at Northwestern.
Well, I looked at their pictures until my eye lids shut. I slept soundly until the morning mail. Howie Snyder wrote to you from South Pasadena. He said that he and Bob Fletcher went to the Dartmouth Night celebration out there. Also mentioned that A 1 Green was living in the vicinity. Howie wants you to say something in your column about the 'ggers getting in touch with Walter Douglas who is the secretary of their Alumni Group. Howie is going to the Univ. of Southern California where he is getting his Secondary School Credentials.
And that is that. I'm going to write a book on "How To Write Class Notes," subtitled "The Little Men Who Aren't There." By the way your literary agent just wired that you have sold another story to Redbook. The title is certainly appropriate—"Women Are Such Fools.". .. .Boyare they! Well, the column is written; you can come home now!
Your loving wife,
Secretary, Box 3384, St. Paul, Minn. Treasurer, 312 Cherry St., Douglaston, L. 1., N. Y. December 12, 1940.
* 700% subscribers to the ALUMNI MACAZINE, on class group plan.
