jeez, Did You Ever See So Many Indians?*
LIKE MOST of the men who attended Dartmouth in the innocent, chauvinistic days of yore when the acme of student protest was an editorial in TheDartmouth suggesting that admission to The Nugget should be cut by a nickel to 30 cents, I always accepted without question the fact that Dartmouth's teams were known as the Indians. We not only accepted it, but knowing the historical roots of the nickname, felt vastly superior to those unfortunate contemporaries of ours on other campuses who had to pledge fealty to such contrived and hackneyed symbols of physical prowess as Tigers, Lions, Bears, Bulldogs and other animals. We not only assumed that our college was rather original in its choice but supposed that few other schools had the imagination or credentials, or—since we were the first—the temerity, to call themselves Indians.
My tepee of smugness was rent a few years ago when two Dartmouth undergraduates of impeccable antecedents, Brian Maracle '69, a Mohawk, and Duane Birdbear '71, from the Mandan Tribe, punctured its tenous membrane by protesting the practice of using a painted and feathered white student as an "Indian" cheerleader. Their logic was eye-opening and compelling. After guiltily examining my own attitudes and past crimes I wondered how many other schools were finding themselves in the same pot, or rather, tied to the same stake. I did nothing but wonder until I read that Stanford University had recently given up the use of their Indian as a symbol or mascot for their teams.
I finally got down to my research when a rainy Sunday afternoon and a blown picture tube coincided. Jack DeGange, Dartmouth's director of sports information, had loaned me a copy of the Blue Book of CollegeAthletics. This impressive publication lists all the colleges and universities in the 50 states and Canada from Abilene Christian to Youngstown State and gives the enrollment, colors, nickname, size of the band, description of the athletic plant, the conferences and leagues the school competes in, the names of all its coaches, all the sports in which it fields a varsity team plus all the intramural sports it offers, and a won-and-lost record for the past year in football and basketball. It also includes the names of the presidents of these 900 institutions.
This is quite a formidable compendium of special information. And while making an inventory of the colleges who call themselves Indians or the equivalant my eye frequently wandered.
Now I am never stumped for conversational chaff. When uncomfortable silences develop in social situations I can—and frequently do—observe that Whittier College of recent notoriety calls its teams by the logical if less than rugged name of "Poets." Poets? Do you suppose Agnew knows about this? I amazed my encounter group during a tactile exercise last week by pointing out that Winconsin State University in La Crosse does not play lacrosse.
But to get back to my survey of aboriginal names among colleges. I was chagrined to discover that no less than 25 institutions of higher learning are known as Indians. When you add on those other Indian names such as Redmen 11, Braves 8, Red Raiders 5, Big Red 3, Chieftains 3, Savages 2, plus one school each for Redskins, Scalpers, Chiefs, Maroon Chiefs, Chippewas, Choctaws, Seminoles, Sioux, Hurons, Illini, Utes, Mound Builderst, Aztecs, and Nanooks the total (71) outnumbers the Tigers 42, Lions 21, Bears 32, and Bulldogs by a very wide margin.
I think real Indian Americans would be interested if not pleased by the fact that when it comes to nationalities represented by college nicknames the Indians overwhelm the palefaces. The many Vikings plus the Norsemen of Luther College, the Swedes of Bethany College in Lindsborg, Kansas, and St. Olaf's Oles is the only army that comes close, with 25 schools jumping into the long boats. Adding up the Scots 5, Highlanders 5, Clansmen 3, and Pipers of Hamline University, the warriors from Caledonia can muster only 14 squads. The other ethnic types are Spartans 7, and Trojans 4, four Flying Dutchmen plus one non-flying Dutchman (Union College), Tartars 3, Gaels 3, Saxons 2, Orangemen 2, and one each for the Fighting Irish, Gothics, Britons, and one of my favorites, the Rajin' Cajuns of Southwestern Louisiana.
Although this category represents 11 different nationalities, all are Caucasian. No Orientals, no Africans, no representatives from the continents or islands of the Pacific. The University of Hawaii calls its teams the Rainbows, a nice acknowledgement of both its climate and the kaleidoscope of races to be found in its student body.
Even though the Indians always seem to lose at the waterholes, in the box canyons, and on the prairies built on the back lots of Hollywood, the 71 colleges displaying warpaint could easily make a confrontation with the schools representing the White Settlers look like Little Big Horn again. There are 21 colleges called Pioneers, seven Mountaineers, five Cowboys, two Fortyniners, two Colonials, and one each for the Explorers, Voyageurs, Mounties, Texans, Westerners, Pilgrims, Sooners, and the 'Pokes of the University of Wyoming. A total of 47 disorganized, unevenly trained, draftees of all ages and national origin pitted against 71 colleges representing the Noble Savages. Custer had it good!
*George Armstrong Custer, June 25, 1875.
You might think I am reaching. If the Mound Builders were from New Jersey one might think the school had a strong major in Cemetery Management. But these Mound Builders bring glory and victory to Southwestern College of Whitefield, Kansas. They must be named for the tribes who used to try to relieve the monotonous horizons of that horizontal state by heaping up the fertile loam in mini-peaks.
